When I graduated high school, I thought I was done with “mean girls.” Because once we realize that we’re all in this together, as women, I thought that we would spend more time building each other up rather than putting each other down. I thought, once we all accepted who we are, and grew up, there wouldn’t be a reason to be so mean to our fellow girls for no reason.
But maybe I was naive in thinking that.
In the words of Cady Heron, “Calling someone ugly doesn’t make you any prettier.” And honestly, meanness just looks worse on you the older you get.
And in middle school and high school, I learned to understand why girls were mean; they were unhappy, insecure, jealous, childish, etc. And I built up an emotional callous to deal with them. But as I grew up, I decided that callous didn’t serve much of a purpose anymore. And that I was a big enough person to take the high road, and to try to get to the root of the meanness of some people.
But in all honesty, lately I’ve been so sick of taking the damn high road. Because in my experiences it has almost never been reciprocated. And I keep telling myself: “They’re not worth it. Don’t worry about it.” all the things that I was taught in grade school. I’m 24 years old and dealing with mean girls again. I’m sorry, but what the fuck? Don’t women have enough to deal with without adding grown up mean girls to it?
I just want to ask these mean girls, what’s your excuse now? Why are you such a coward that you can’t bring your issues directly to me? Am I a threat to you? Have I hurt you in some way? Are you that unhappy in your own life that you feel the need to spread that unhappiness? If so, why don’t you get out of your unhappy situation? Have some self-respect, courage, girl power, whatever you want to call it.
I didn’t have great experiences with girls in my life. And it deeply affected me. But I worked my ass off to get out of the pit that those people pushed me into. And I am absolutely not going to let your bad attitude and self-hatred seep into my life. In high school my motto used to be, “Love me or hate me, either way you’re thinking about me.” Now I’m thinking I need to modify it to “Love me, or don’t bother.” Because I just don’t have room in my life for negativity.