Today I had an overwhelming desire to drive 80 miles north and visit my college town of Fort Collins. Mind you, students are still on break, so it wouldn’t be the same old Fort Collins that I grew to love. Mind you, I still miss being a student, and the community that CSU created for me. It’s often hard for me to discern whether it’s Fort Collins I miss or CSU.
While I was there, I hated Fort Collins. I would gripe about it being too small of a town, and the traffic too busy. I would complain that it didn’t ever snow, it just got too cold, and then that it snowed too much and we didn’t get a snow day. And then just weeks before I left, I stopped to look around me. And I was taken aback at just how beautiful that city is, and it wasn’t until that moment that I stopped to think, “Okay, maybe I’ll miss this place a little.”
Of course I miss going to school. I miss learning new things, being with peers, having intellectual conversations and challenging tasks. I don’t miss the uncaring professors, the anchors in group projects, the stress and agony over whether or not you’ll finish that book in time, turn in that paper, collect all your sources. I don’t miss the nights when I questioned if what I was doing was the right thing (not that those don’t happen still), cried to my parents over the phone, and the weeks that seemed to drag on so long that the only cure would be to go home for the weekend. But I miss school. And Fort Collins, the place that allowed me to grow, and call home for four short years.
Today, I just missed the beauty of Fort Collins; the temperate nature and the welcoming atmosphere. Today, I wanted to go back to the place that saw me grow. Today, I wanted to remember what it felt like, and how different I was in Fort Collins.