What it’s like to date a girl who writes

To date a girl who writes is often no easy feat. They are aware of their character flaws and they are constantly trying to see the end of the story. But dating a girl who writes means that you will date a girl who feels, and who loves.

  1. She will be insecure. Her work will never be good enough. She may feel like it is a reflection of herself. She reads her own work and still finds the flaws in them; still feels like she could have had a stronger ending, or better metaphors, etc.
  2. Text messages are mini manifestos. There is not a comma that is out of place. Auto-correct is incorrect more times than not. Emojiis are used sparingly and only to clarify her tone. Pay attention to her punctuation. “I love you.” and “I love you!” mean two different things in her mind.
  3. She will over-analyze every word you say. To misspeak is human, but be careful. She will remember the words you used. She will believe that even if you misspoke, you actually did mean it exactly how it was phrased. Your gut reaction is often times the most honest, and she will replay your words in her head, over and over again.
  4. There will be times when she just needs to write. Many times she will need to be by herself, in her own space with a pen and paper. Sometimes she won’t even know what it is that she needs to write about, but she can feel it in her bones. The best thing you can do in that moment, is hand her a pen and leave her to it.
  5. Romance looks a little different for her. Yes, she will appreciate the traditional acts of romance, probably because they remind her of a book. But sometimes, handing her that pen is romantic. Reading her writing is romantic. Writing something yourself is romantic.
  6. She will write about you more times than you know. When she’s happy, she writes about you. When she’s sad, she writes about you. She writes more words about you than she will ever admit to. And if a relationship with a writer ever ends, she will have thousands and thousands of words to remember you by.
  7. She may be tough to crack. There will be times when she gets silent. She may need to open up more than ever in those moments, but she is in her own head, and she is composing. She may be composing the first line to one of her best pieces. She may be composing just the right sentence to tell you how she’s feeling. She may take longer than most to just tell you what is going on, this is because she cares too much to be clumsy with her words.
  8. She wants you to read what she writes. She believes you can learn more about her through her writing than any other way. She wants to know what you think of her work. If you love it or hate it, she wants to hear it. If it makes you think, or see things in a different way, she wants to hear it. She wants to know that at some point her words make a difference for you.
  9. She will want to write your own vows. If you marry a girl that writes, you will need to write your own vows. She will write many drafts of her own and vacillate between the different versions. Should she use the one that shows her sense of humor? Should she use the one full of irony? Which one portrays your relationship more accurately? Even when she finally decides, she will still second guess herself. But whatever you write for that occasion will be perfect to her.
  10. She knows what it feels like to be empty. She feels deeply. She can empathize with people easily. And she will attempt to take your pain away and heal all your broken parts.
  11. She will give you her heart. She pours her heart onto the page. When everyone else seems too busy for her, she knows that pen and paper will always be there. And when she finds someone who is there for her and who cares enough to stick around, she will love you deeply. She will make your happiness her own. She will continuously try to find ways to show her love for you, but she will never feel as though they are enough. She’ll try to learn how you need to be loved and tailor her love to you, like she tailors her writing to her audience. You are the audience of her heart.

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